Dirty Laundry
by HeroWorshiper
Summary: It's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it!  Response to Ginger S's quote challenge.


My response to Ginger S.'s quote challenge:

**"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually fear you will make one." .**

Emergency! is the property of Mark VII and Universal. No profit will be gained when I take these boys out for a spin. I promise to dust 'em off and send them on their way at the end of the story.

**Dirty Laundry**

Roy DeSoto and Johnny Gage walked out of the back doors of Rampart Emergency. Johnny's uniform was covered in mud. Roy was clean, save for muddy shoes.

"Hang on just a second there Junior." Roy called as the pair approached the shiny clean squad. "You look like the mud monster. Let me see if we can keep the squad from becoming the monster mobile. All right?" Roy stepped ahead of his partner and reached the side compartment of the squad opening the bay door to withdraw a disposable yellow plastic blanket. Tossing the cover to Johnny Roy said "Here Junior, drape this over the seat of the squad so we're not cleaning mud off of things for days.

"Mud monster? Hey, haven't ya heard? You are talkin to a bona fide hero! I saved those two kids, remember. Let's show a little respect here!" John said with a demonstrate of mock self-richeous indignation, while catching the blanket out of the air as it flew toward him. Seat protecting covering in hand, Johnny opened the plastic package and spread the yellow tarp over the seat before sliding into the squad accompanied by Roy's gentle laughter as his partner climbed behind the wheel of the rescue vehicle and waited for Johnny to situate his mud drenched body in the passenger's seat.

The men of L.A. County fire station 51 had just completed the rescue of two teens that had been skateboarding in a spillway, and become tangled in some debris. Johnny, the smallest of 51's men had been called upon to wriggle into the wreckage and secure the teens as his crew mates pulled them free. It had been a muddy nasty job, but necessary and satisfying for Johnny. Everyone had been extricated successfully, and both teen boys would recover from minor injuries. All in all, the rescue had been triumphant, unless you were Johnny's uniform.

The journey to the fire house well underway, Johnny looked down at his mud incrusted self remarking with a wry grin. "This job sure can be tough on clothing, huh."

Grinning wickedly, Roy quickly glanced down at his own clothes and replied "No, not so bad here. It'd only be tough if the clothing belonged to you partner."

"Ha Ha…." Johnny mocked. "Hey! What exactly are ya tryin to say there partner?"

"Nothin….." Roy said; a look of innocent on his face clearly betrayed by the humorous twinkle in his blue eyes. Both men chuckled merrily as they rode on to the barn, one clean and comfortable, one eagerly anticipating a nice hot shower and change of uniform.

When the paramedics arrived at the station, Johnny found his way to the locker room where he removed his soiled uniform, showered and dressed in fresh clothing. After stowing his grubby garments, Johnny cleaned his shoes, badge and pins, then finally had himself reassembled just in time for the klaxon to send he and Roy out on an unknown rescue call.

When the rescue squad arrived on scene, the medics discovered a young blond haired blue eyed very attractive woman anxiously awaiting them on the sidewalk in front of a small brick home. The woman was in tears, wringing her hands with excitement.

Even before Roy had brought the bright red truck to a complete stop, Johnny leapt from the vehicle and jogged to the woman's side. "Hello ma'am. I'm John Gage. What seems to be the problem?"

Tear stained blue eyes turned to Johnny beseechingly. "Oh, my son….he's…he's….stuck…. He crawled under the house after our puppy, and he…..can't get out!" The woman sobbed.

"All right ma'am. Calm down. We'll get him out." Johnny said patting her gently on the shoulder. "Where did he get under the house?" Johnny asked. By this time Roy had joined Johnny on the sidewalk and was beginning to visually assess the distraught woman.

The woman directed Johnny and Roy to the opening of a crawl space on the side of the home. Johnny quickly jogged back to the squad, and opening the side compartment he donned his turnout coat and retrieved a flashlight before jogging back over to the small opening. Roy gently took the distressed mother by the shoulder, and after assuring her the men would take good care of her son, Roy led the woman to the back of the squad. He sat her down on the wide back bumper, and began helping her calm down because her emotionally troubled state was causing her to hyperventilate.

Johnny entered the small opening, and carefully slithered on his belly underneath the house until he located an eight year boy. The child had wedged his foot into a small space between two pipes. Johnny freed the boy, and after a cursory examination determined the child was uninjured. The paramedic directed the boy whose name was Thomas to crawl back out from under the house, but Thomas frantically shook his head as tears began to role from his eyes. "I have to rescue Bobbles, my puppy. He's under here and I have to get him." Thomas sobbed.

"Thomas, you go on out." Johnny soothed. "I'll get Bobbles and bring him out to you."

Thomas sniffled, and his big brown eyes gratefully stared into Johnny's brown orbs. "O.K…..th..thanks." he said sniffing, and turned crawling toward the opening.

After a brief search, Johnny found a small puppy happily digging in the dirt under the house. Johnny gently latched onto the obviously young pup, and began the arduous task of extricating himself and the animal from under the dwelling. As he crawled, Johnny could finally see the light of the opening before him. The puppy, who it seemed had been really enjoying his time under the house saw the opening too, deciding he didn't want to leave the underside of the home and quickly evaded Johnny's grasp, running back from whence he had come. With an exasperated sigh, Johnny crawled back after the animal. When he finally reached his target, the fireman retrieved the pup, and slipped the animal into the deep pocket of his turnout coat for safe keeping before he again laboriously turned to slither toward freedom.

Thomas emerged from the crawl space first, and was met by Roy who took the child to the squad for a quick welfare check, and reunion. After a few minutes, Johnny too emerged from beneath the home. Victoriously the medic strode over to the squad where, with a flourish he scooped the pup from the pocket of his turnout coat and attempted to present the animal to Thomas.

But, the fates it seemed were not on Johnny's side today because as he lifted the puppy the animal decided it was time for some physical relief. In what had to be the most perfectly timed drop, the animal released a stream of first urine, then liquid feces from beneath its tail, whereupon the liquid promptly landed with a nasty splatter upon Johnny's pants and shoes. It wasn't until gravity had led most of the mess onto his pants that Johnny could react and quickly set the animal on the ground to finish its function in the grass.

"Aaarff!" Johnny said as he quickly set the puppy down. But it was too late. Another pair of uniform pants would need to be retired for the day.

The puppy's owner's apologized profusely to the medics, and thanked the men for helping them before taking the puppy and returning to their home. Johnny attempted to clean the thickening nasty goo from his shoes and pants with a couple of old rags, with little success.

Roy patted his partner sympathetically on the shoulder and said "um….back to the barn then partner?" And he opened the driver's door to slide behind the wheel.

Johnny sighed, tucked the dirty rags into a refuse bag, slammed the bay door and climbed gingerly into the squad. "Yeah…I think so. Guess I need to change pants."

"Guess so!" Roy said, unable to stop the wicked grin spreading across his face. "Well partner, you've rescued another happy pair." Then chuckling he started the squad's engine saying. "Ya know Johnny, this hero business is a dirty job."

Glancing ruefully down at his soiled pants, Johnny said "Yeah! It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it. And partner….I'm thinkin next time, that someone needs to be you."

"Well Junior, I'd have crawled under that house, but you jumped out of the squad before I could even get it into park." Roy replied. "Can't help but wonder if you'd have moved so quick if the Mom hadn't been such a looker."

Johnny laughed out right now. "All right, all right….." he said raising his hands in surrender. "Hey, I couldn't just let a pretty lady in distress suffer like that. You could see she was obviously upset. I was just tryin' to make her feel better."

"Oh yeah, that's what you were doin'." Roy said. "Aw shucks Mr. Fireman, You're such a hero" Roy mocked in a feminine falsetto." And he batted his eyelashes in Johnny's direction.

"Oh shut up." Johnny said punching his partner in the arm good naturedly. Both men laughed heartily as they continued toward the station, and yet another shower, change of uniform and shoe cleaning for Johnny.

After removing, rinsing and stowing the grungy uniform pants, Johnny quickly stripped and showered in hopes of removing the lingering aroma of feces. Quickly he hopped out of the shower, and donned yet another set of uniform pants, and the thankfully unharmed shirt he had been wearing. The tones sounded just as he buttoned his last shirt button. Quickly Johnny sprinted to the squad, tucking his shirt in with one practiced smooth motion as he moved.

This call was for a man down in a shopping center. When Roy and Johnny arrived they were directed to a gentleman who had collapsed onto the sidewalk outside of one of the shops. The medics approached the man noting the intense smell of ethanol as they advanced. Johnny and Roy exchanged glances, and Roy had to smile when he received Johnny's unspoken message delivered with a slightly raised eyebrow and small head movement. Johnny was indicating to Roy it was Roy's turn to work with what could potentially turn out to be a messy situation.

Roy silently acknowledged his partner, and took the lead stepping forward to address the patient. Kneeling Roy gently shook the man saying "Sir, sir….. Are you all right? Sir? I'm a paramedic with the Las Angeles County Fire Department. Sir? Can you hear me?" The man didn't move. There seemed to be no indication he was conscious at all.

Roy sat the drug box down beside their patient, opened it and began to take vital signs. Johnny stayed a couple paces away from the pair as he knelt to open the biophone. All seemed to be going as expected. Roy relayed vitals to Johnny who spoke with Rampart. Johnny relayed Brackett's orders to Roy who began to prepare the normal saline I.V. Dr. Brackett had ordered. Johnny acknowledged Brackett's orders, and leaned over to note them on the MICU form while Roy tightened a tourniquet on the patient's arm.

But when Roy stuck the man with the needle the drunken man's consciousness level changed rapidly. Suddenly he opened his eyes, leaned forward in a vain attempt to escape the sting of the needle and Roy's firm grasp, then his eyes rolled back in his head, and he projectile vomited. The chain of events happened in half a second, unfortunately the half second Johnny had looked down to make his note on the MICU form. Johnny heard the sound, and almost instantly felt warmth seeping down his back.

Roy saw it happen. He'd have warned his friend if he could have, but he was totally occupied with hanging on to the inebriated man's arm, and attempting to keep the man from smacking his head on the pavement as he fell.

"AAAAGH!" Johnny screamed as he jumped to his feet backing away. The emesis had spewed over the back of Johnny's shirt. Though most of it had splashed onto the pavement on the other side of him, he still had gotten a significant amount of the putrid material on his shirt which necessitated its immediate removal. Quickly Johnny stripped off his blue uniform shirt and t-shirt and grabbed his navy blue Normex jacket out of the squad.

In the mean time Roy had established the I.V., and gently laid his drunken charge on his side on the ground. Looking up at his partner apologetically Roy said "Are you all right Junior? I am so sorry! That happened so fast I didn't even realize it was coming!"

Johnny shook his head in disbelief. He had gotten dirty NOT taking the lead in a case. It just wasn't his day. Johnny glanced at Roy and smiled weakly saying "Yeah, I'm fine. I guess my uniform shirt will be too after a good wash."

The paramedics completed getting their patient packaged for transport just as the ambulance arrived. Roy rode with the victim, and after spreading a protective blanket in the squad's seat and stowing his soiled shirts, Johnny climbed into the squad and followed the ambulance to Rampart. When the medic had delivered their patient to Rampart, Johnny barrowed some scrubs with Dixie's blessing and speedily found the surgeon's locker room to take a quick shower and get out of the rest of his smelly uniform.

Yet again upon arriving at the station, Johnny made his trek to the locker room to change into a fresh uniform. As his scrubs clad form entered the locker room, Johnny crossed paths with Chet Kelly. "New uniform there Gage?" Chet quipped waggling his bushy eyebrows as he spoke, blues eyes twinkling merrily.

"I'm not in the mood Chet." Johnny warned as he walked past the taunting man.

"Easy Gage! I was just teasing." Chet said. "What happened this time?"

"A drunk puked on me!" Johnny sullenly replied as he pulled the green scrub top off over his head. "I swear it's just not my day for uniforms!"

Chet turned back into the locker room grinning. "What's this make? Three or Four changes of clothing for you today?" He questioned as he seated himself on the bench near the door.

Roy walked into the room just as Chet finished his question. "Chet, don't give him a rough time." He warned as he walked over to the sink to wash his hands.

Chet splayed his open hand across his chest saying "Hey! I'm wounded here! I was just askin'!"

Roy and Johnny speaking simultaneously replied with a clearly disbelieving "UuuHuuuuh…"

"Can't a fella make conversation around here without being accused of something?" Chet implored almost seriously.

Roy withdrew a paper towel from the dispenser and began drying his hands saying "Yes some guys can, but you….well, let's just say most of the time your motives are not exactly pure."

Johnny had finished dressing and was wiping his shoes down with a damp towel to remove any traces of organic material.

"I was askin' out of concern Johnny." Chet said. "You know, I have figured out what happens with you most of the time."

"Oh?" Johnny said glaring at Chet now.

"Yeah, it's something I once heard from my Mother." Chet said.

"O.K., I'll bite." Johnny replied suspiciously. "What are ya talkin' about Chet?"

"Well, you can't help but notice how many uniforms you go through in a shift." Chet began before Johnny interrupted him with a snort saying "Yeah….especially when the phantom has been busy."

"No Gage, I'm not talkin about that, though if I factor in your phantom encounters, my theory still applies." Chet continued.

"Theory?" Roy said raising an eyebrow. "You've got a theory?"

"Huh, I thought you'd have to have more than a couple of brain cells to rub together to come up with something as abstract as a theory." Johnny said not missing an opportunity to jab his nemesis.

"Says you!" Chet retorted, but didn't seem to be upset with the taunts. "Anyway, like I was sayin' before I was so rudely interrupted, my theory on Johnny's uniform situation sort of comes from this saying my Mother once told me. She used to quote this guy…um… Elbert Hubbard….the quote went something like _**"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually fear you will make one."**_

"What's that got to do with me getting dirty all the time? Your cracked Chet! That one came right out of left field." Johnny replied as he tucked in his shirt.

Chet put his hands up in a gesture intended to halt the other two men. "Just hang on a minute, and let me finish, will ya!" He said looking over at Roy as he spoke. "Ya see, Gage in some ways has to be one of the bravest guys I know 'cause he sees a situation and just dives right in. He never stops to think about what's gonna happen to him as a result of his actions if someone else's health or safety are on the line." Chet stated. Turning to John he continued "If you stopped to wonder if whatever you were doin would make things tough for you, or dirty or whatever….you'd probably hesitate too long bein' afraid or whatever, and it'd make you less effective as a rescue man and paramedic."

"O.K….." Johnny replied his voice and demeanor still holding a clear note of suspicion. "So how does this theory of yours apply to my encounters with the phantom?"

"Geeze Gage! Are ya dense or somthin?" Chet said impatiently as he rose from his seat on the bench. "You react the same way no matter what situation you are in. You are an act first, deal with the consequences later kinda guy. It's probably what makes you such a great rescue man and paramedic…..and such a fantastic pigeon!"

Johnny and Roy were now staring at Chet with open mouthed dismay. Chet grinned at the medics, winked, and turned on his heal striding out of the locker room.

After a moment of stunned silence Johnny looked at Roy and remarked "Did I just hear Chet complimenting me? Maybe you should check me for concussion or something?"

Roy's blue eyes danced with amusement "I think your fine Junior. I heard it too. Don't believe it, but it did sort of sound like he gave you a rather backhanded compliment. Maybe I should check _him _for concussion."

The paramedics enjoyed a moment of amusement, and began to walk from the locker room. As they strode through the apparatus bay Roy stopped behind the engine momentarily deep in thought. Johnny, noticing his Pally had stopped walking stopped too turning to look at Roy's face.

Roy's gaze seemed thoughtful for a moment, and Johnny was becoming curious. "What?" he finally inquired.

"Well, ya know Junior, Chet just might have a point." Roy replied, a thoughtful aura still surrounding him.

"What'da ya mean?" Johnny inquired.

"You are one of those people who'll jump in where others fear to tread. It makes you a great medic and probably gets you dirty or injured more than most." Roy thoughtfully provided.

"Huh….." Johnny said running long slender fingers thoughtfully through raven locks. "Yeah….could be. Never really thought much about it. But, really….in our line of work do we have all that much time to stop and think about what might happen to us before we need to act?"

"Well, no." Roy replied. "But as the guy who's got your back, I sometimes sort of wish you _would_ look before you leap. It's not so much I want you to be afraid you'll make a mistake. It's more I wish you would consider the consequences if things are gonna get dangerous. Still, I have to admit, Chet's probably right. Your penchant toward no fear does make you one heck of a medic, and I am always glad you have my back! If I were the one in need of help, I'd for sure want it to be you, or someone like you who came to my rescue."

Johnny was somewhat flabbergasted by the sudden turn the conversation had taken. On one hand, his friends were expressing their pride in his work while at the very same time they were offering a wish for him to perhaps be more careful. Johnny found he was at a loss for words.

Both men began to walk toward the kitchen again, each alone with his thoughts.

Johnny led the way into the kitchen. Turning to his partner he said "I'm gonna get some coffee, you want me to get you a cup?"

"Thanks, that'd be great." Roy replied as he turned to join Mike, Marko and Chet at the kitchen table. Johnny stepped up to the cabinet where mugs were kept, and quickly jerked the door open. Suddenly a loud _sproing!_ Was heard in the room, and a flurry of white confetti flew out of the launcher which had been primed and ready inside the cupboard. With a totally surprised expression, Johnny caught the mess of paper bits square in the face. As white minute paper flakes settled to the floor around the handsome young medic, a larger slip fluttered to the counter top. Johnny picked up the slip and read the inscription it contained aloud to his chuckling crew mates. The paper said "Jump right in pigeon, it's what makes you great! "The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually fear you will make one." Elbert Hubbard."

Johnny turned to see his crew mates still giggling. Glancing at Chet, Johnny received a salute and smile. "Way to go Gage! Gotcha again!" Chet said as he stood from his place at the table, and left the room to retrieve a broom and dust pan. Returning shortly, Chet dutifully cleared up the mess. Glancing over his shoulder at his seated friend he slyly remarked "Hmmm…guess the phantom thought it'd be a good idea to take it easy on your uniform this time Gage, seeing as you have already wrecked three sets of clothes today. Guess this just proves the phantom knows all, and sees all"

Still chuckling a little himself Johnny toasted his friend with his coffee mug replying "Well, tell the phantom thank you for me when you see him Chet. And you can also tell him I appreciate the compliment."

"Compliment? I have no idea what you are talking about." Chet replied innocently as he emptied the dust pan.

Johnny opened his mouth to reply just as the tones sounded sending the squad out for a man down call.

"Come on Junior." Roy said herding his partner toward the squad, truncating any snappy come back Johnny might have been prepared to deliver.

As the two medics climbed into their vehicle, Chet who had already been standing acknowledged the call and handing the slip through the window to Roy, Chet looked over at Johnny smiling. "Be careful out there." He said, and he slapped the squad door gently stepping back away from the truck to allow for Roy to drive from the bay.

As Roy and Johnny rode toward their next call Johnny couldn't help but ponder Chet's words. He'd sort of always known Chet liked him, and the teasing was just a way for the two men to connect. But Chet's little theory did give Johnny pause to consider. Perhaps his Irish friend was trying, in his own twisted way, to tell Johnny he was proud of the job Johnny did. Johnny smiled as he contemplated his friendship with Chet. _"I'm never gonna figure him out! He's proud of how I do my job, and he's concerned for my well being. Who knew?"_

Arriving on scene, Johnny and Roy found a man stumbling toward the street from a garage. The man's hand was cut deeply and blood seemed to be spurting from the wound. Johnny leapt from the still moving squad as their patient came into view. Rapidly he ran over to the injured man and quickly found a firm grip occluding the brachial artery in an attempt to stem the swift blood loss their victim was exhibiting. Blood went everywhere!

The medics contacted rampart, an I.V. was set up and tourniquet applied. The victim was packaged quickly for transport, and Johnny rode in the ambulance with the injured man.

After the patient was safely delivered to Rampart, Johnny and Roy again strode out of the back doors of Rampart. Johnny's uniform was splattered with blood. Roy clad in a spotless uniform preceded his partner out the hospital doors and opened the back passenger's side bay doors of the squad. He retrieved a yellow blanket from the compartment and tossed the blanket to Johnny before heading around the squad to slide into the driver's seat.

Johnny snatched the blanket from the air grinning broadly. Glancing down at his clothing he couldn't help but chuckle. He'd managed to do it yet again today. Another uniform had fallen to the line of duty. As he spread the protective yellow tarp over the squad seat Johnny couldn't help but wonder if that Elbert Hubbard guy realized how much dirty laundry could be created as a result of a person heeding the message in his proverb.

The End


End file.
